In my last blog, we talked about the inevitable wall you will hit when you’re working towards a goal – a.k.a., the slump. While we all know that the path to success is not without obstacles, it can be hard to admit that things aren’t going as planned. You might even find yourself thinking “It will be a miracle if I manage to reach this goal!”.
When it feels like everything is working against you, you might be tempted to push back even harder to break through the resistance, like I did. My advice: Don’t.
In fact, the best way to get out of your slump is to surrender to it. If you don’t, your body might take matters into it’s own hands by getting sick. And here’s the best part:
The simple intention to surrender control is all you need to experience miracles. – Gabrielle Bernstein
This might go against everything you’ve been taught about persistence and not giving up, but I have learned first hand that miracles can happen when you let go of the struggle. Here are the three steps that I took to get out of my slump and shift my mindset from frustration to clarity.
First, let go of the struggle. Surrender to it. This is what we started talking about in the last post, acknowledging that you’re in a slump and calling it by name. When I lay in bed, sicker that I had been in a long time, I took the time to face the facts and identify all the negative thoughts that were swirling around in my mind. I pulled out my journal and made a list of all the stuff that was bringing me down and causing me stress. It was a relief to let it all out of my mind and onto the page and be brutally honest with myself about how I was feeling.
Note: Try to be kind to yourself by also writing down what has worked or by writing down what you have accomplished. Helps keep things in perspective!
Then, ask yourself: “How do I want to feel instead?” This powerful question comes from the wisdom of Danielle LaPorte. When we’re chasing our dreams, we’re really chasing the feeling that accomplishing the goal will bring, not necessarily the goal itself. When I asked myself this question, I heard loud and clear – I want to feel supported. When I reflected on the difference between my current feelings and my desired feeling, I realised that my fear of not being good enough was creating a lot of nasty, unhelpful thoughts that were the exact opposite of supportive. I was my own worst enemy.
Finally, what’s one small thing you could do right now/today to bring on that feeling you’re craving? The feeling you are looking for is always available to you, you just need to slow down and turn inward in order to access it. For me, it began with taking the time to be sick without feeling guilty; focusing on self care, throwing out the to-do list and critical thoughts. I also began using my Five Minute Journal again each morning, noting three things I could do during the day to feel supported.
Once I finally surrendered to my slump and followed these steps, the shift from frustration to clarity happened quickly and easily. Miraculous!
Lisa Zamparo is a financial strategist and lifestyle optimist, as well as a Chartered Professional Accountant (CPA), business coach and personal finance expert in Toronto who helps people make intentional decisions with their money. As a one-on-one coach, her personalized approach to financial planning helps her clients achieve their goals by aligning their spending with their priorities. As an inspirational educator, Lisa leads workshops that infuse mindfulness principles with financial concepts delivered in a fun and approachable style.